These 37 Hysterical Fails From Last Week Have Me Laughing So Hard I Think I’ve Formed A Single Ab

Editor’s Note: While we can’t endorse what X has become, we can bring you the fun moments that still exist there, curated and free of the surrounding chaos.

Monday is back and Monday’ing with a vengeance. At least it’s almost officially summer, right? As always, my anti-Monday crusade continues — but I’m also starting to think I should add adults not having a summer break to my agenda of vengeance. As I set my sights on a new target, here are 37 hilarious fails from last week to help get us through:

1.Sir…no.

2.It’s way, way too early for this.

3.We love you, even if you smell like barf.

4.Actually this is kind of cool, minus the sunburn part.

5.Can I get a “Torta Pounder” with cheese?

6.That’s because your intuition knows eggs are too expensive.

7.These are “pigs in a blanket” adjacent.

8.New fear unlocked.

9.What a lovely evening.

10.Well, that’s one way to make the shelves look stocked.

11.Because…I didn’t have a job there?

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12.I always wanted my birthday theme to be “terrifying Quiznos Spongmonkey!”

13.Is there…something you want to tell me about the cookies, or just a premonition of some type?

14.Sure, no problem.

15.I guess they’re getting their protein.

16.Delayed-release murderer.

17.Please just get me safely to my destination, sir.

18.This is the fault of the snacks for being too delicious.

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19.Hot mustard-ception.

20.We only have fart time jobs here.

21.My new password is: H@Lit0sIs!!

22.Does the sauce come on the side or is it just a soggy mess when it arrives?

23.“Just keep them in your car,” they say, and then I still end up in the store without them.

24.Planes are flown by the pirate and first mate.

25.This is art.

26.Did she use Cronenberg’s chocolate chip cookie recipe?

27.Two rides would’ve been fine, but the third put it over the top.

28.Thanks, mom.

29.Shaken, stirred, or with a tennis ball?

30.Run. And take all your clothes off and burn them. Also, shower before entering your home.

31.Maybe I should be driving a pedicab…

32.Only our elders are allowed a little treat, apparently.

33.Imagine the frog, though, getting flung out of his living room.

34.Time to go to a new pharmacy.

35.Choose the traffic lights or you can’t have dinner.

36.Each of them provides a different service.

37.And finally, wait a few days and buy another sandwich, I guess.

If you enjoyed these laughs, go follow the creators! And for more fails, check out our most recent posts:

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